HOMEPAGE LIBRARY

After a few weeks of tending to my injuries, I visited Liza. She was lying in bed with the covers almost covering her head, thinking about Lynna probably.
"Uh hi... Liza. How's it going...." I awkwardly say. She doesn't respond.
"I- I'm sorry....about... Lynna." I say. Liza mutters something I can't hear. "There's a funeral for Lynna tomorrow." I say. "They're going to burn her body. I- I guess that's what they do." Liza doesn't respond at all. "I decided to get you something." I continue. "It's a piece of Lynna's shirt." It's just a small red piece of cloth. Big enough to tie around your arm, but that's about it. I set it next to Liza. She mumbles something again. 'Sorry, I couldn't hear that." I say as politely as possible. "How are you feeling?" Liza says, a little louder than a whisper. "I-I'm fine." I say. "Good." Liza mumbles before pulling the covers over her head. "Lynna's funeral is at 7:00 tomorrow at sunset at ." I say. Liza mumbles something again as I leave her tent.
Outside waiting for me is Rin. She was elected leader since Lynna died. "Hey Luna. How'd it go?" She asks sadly. "Okay, I guess. Where's Cole?" I ask. "He's at the tent. Crying I bet." she said. "I dunno." We walked to a bench by a giant campfire. We sat down in silence as Rin fed sticks to the fire. "They'll be havin' a funeral for that Riley boy. I'm gonna speak at it. Cause y'know, I'm the leader now." Rin says. "Lynna would usually do it but..." her voice trailed off. "You don't suppose you could be my co-leader?" she says after a minute. "C-co-leader?' I stammer. "Yeah. Most of the clan's too emotionally torn apart to lead anythin'. That only leaves you and Liza. You know Liza can't lead. Not right now. "Rin says. "I wouldn't choose somebody who just arrived, but you know, you're the only one with the right mindset to lead." she adds.
Lead? Me? No. I'm not any sort of leader. I'm just some 13-year-old who people keep dying for. I can't do anything, I'm just some idiot with a powerful gun and no brain. I'm probably less mentally stable than the rest of these guys. The few weeks in the Infirmary made me realize how pathetic I was. I kept crying and taking out my anger on those that I hated without even thinking. Everyone around me had to deal with my temper tantrums. Elison and Serena died because of how incapable I was of taking care of myself. Lynna and Riley died because I was so confident in myself and my pathetic sword fighting abilities. I tried to be happy and nice to cheer everyone around me up but no. That's not how the world works. I thought everything could go our way because we kept believing in ourselves. Then reality hit me like a train wreck. A positive attitude can't change anything. It just gives us a false sense of hope before the inevitable. Death. Everyone around us are dying, and I thought I could change that. Rin must be out of her mind to choose some emotional teen who people keep risking their lives for. What did Elison see in me? What did anybody see in me?
"No." I said to Rin. "Sorry." I added. She looked a little shocked. "Ah, naw it's fine." She said after a second. "I'll just ask your brother or Lora or somethin' "she says. "Nice chat Luna." Rin adds as she walks away. I sit on the bench for a few more minutes before leaving for my tent.
At Riley's funeral, we burned his body. Rin gave her promised speech. I didn't see Liza anywhere. She was probably still in her tent. I hoped she would be at Lynna's funeral at least. Of course she would be at Lynna's funeral. She was Lynna's sister. I looked around me. Everyone was crying. I looked at Riley's dead body in the fire. This was my fault. Why did he trust me? He didn't even know me. Smoke covered the sky above us. How did this place stay hidden? I wonder. Maybe nobody cared about a bunch of kids who had run away from their clans. Kids like Riley. Kids like Lynna. Kids like Elison. Kids like Serena.
Serena.
She trusted me. She cared about me. Elison's counting on us. I remember those words that she said to me. Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry. Your emotions are what killed all these people.
I started to cry.
The fire in front of me kept burning. Smoke clouded the sky. Tears fell into the ground under me. Rin stood on the wooden bench behind the fire. At that moment, I truly hated myself.
We all went back to our tents. The night was quiet and dull. There weren't any children playing outside. Everything was silent.
Shino came from the ranch the next day, after hearing what happened to Lynna. She made some soup for everyone in camp, but not a lot of us ate it.
Lynna's funeral was more depressing than Riley's, if that as even possible. Liza was there, sitting beside me with the most blank stare I had ever seen. I turned away. I'm sorry. I thought. But inside, I knew sorry wasn't enough. It would never be enough. I'm sorry. I really am.
Rin climbed onto the bench.
"Hello members of Camp CrescentRun." she started. "Today we have all gathered here to remember the death of our leader, Lynna.
Lynna....
Lynna was an amazing person. When I ran away from Raven Stone I was so lost...and alone... I didn't know what to do... and Lynna was just like me. Lost. Confused. Like Al of you were. Lynna... didn't act like a leader. She was a friend. Our best friend. She was our shoulder to cry on and so much more... I..." Rin stopped for a second. "Lynna was amazing, she really was. We couldn't have asked for a better leader. She was strong and smart. She could conceal a clan of runaways. And now I know how. It's not because we're in the woods, or because we stay away from other clans... It's because nobody cares. And they may not care, but we do, and Lynna cares. Now, we need to make everyone else care too. " Rin faked a half smile thing. " Liza and Luna came here to warn us, and others about aliens..." No. This can't be happening. Rin, you idiot. This isn't about me. Or anyone else. This is Lynna's funeral. I'm ruining it. I'm ruining everything. It needs to stop. I need to stop. Stop breathing. Stop aliens. Elison. I'm sorry Elison, Serena. Everyone else. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
"Thank you." Rin's voice breaks through my thoughts. Everyone starts to get up and leave. I start to walk to the tent. Somebody shoves me. It's a guy with black hair. "This is your fault. " He says and kicks me. He starts walking away, crying. Nobody else seems to mind. Yeah. It is my fault.
I'm woken up by Rin the next day. "Ready to go to RavenStone?" She says with a fake grin. I instantly plaster a fake smile onto my face. "Of course."
"Great! You can wake up Liza!"
I'm probably the last person Liza wants to see right now.